My best friend

Just stuff

School is going.
Wedding plans are going.
The job hunt is going.

I'm just tired. So tired. This is by far the most intensive semester I've had in college. It just sucks that it had to be my last semester. Especially one in which I've got so much other stuff going on.

I also feel really bad, because I've hit a pretty serious wall about wanting to do stuff. I'm so sick and tired of listening to crap from people. I'm not kidding. I'm really afraid that one day I'm just going to snap. I'm going to all of a sudden start telling people what I think. And they aren't going to like it. At all. It won't be pretty.

For instance, I have a resident that keeps talking about how everyone seems so happy but he's miserable. I feel sorry for the kid. Really. But I can only take that for so long. Too much more of it and he's going to get an earful. Seriously, does he think everyone is happy all the time? Because I'm sure not. That's just ignorance. And I can only deal with ignorance for so long.

On top of that, I just find that I'm really unmotivated. I do my work, and I do it well, but I don't go above and beyond. I can't. I've given so much of myself to so many different things over the last three years that I'm out. I can't give extra right now.

I know that once I graduate, I'll be sad that I'm done. But right now, I just want to finish. I want to be in the same town as Sean. I want to be finalizing our wedding plans. I want to be working. Working somewhere where I can make a difference. I want to live in a house and not a box. I want to sleep in a big bed. I want a bath tub. I want a pet.

I want to grow up! (But not really)





Oh, and here's a picture I made the other day. Because of it, I changed the colors for the wedding. They're now black and white with pale green accents.

SEAN SURPRISED ME!! THE WHOLE TIME HE WAS TEXTING ME THIS AFTERNOON SAYING HE HAD TOO MUCH READING TO DO, HE WAS ON HIS WAY HERE!!!!


(he's with the guys right now; I get him back soon!)

Very much blah

I'm not sure what's going on with me. I'm very blah feeling. I know it would get better if I went for a run or something, but I'm not really feeling that either. I'm just down. Maybe it's because it's almost 4 o'clock, and I'm still sitting in my room. I've not made any effort to get ready today or anything.

I have no motivation. An outline that should have taken an hour or so took nearly three. I just can't seem to get focused on anything. Weekends are hard. This is the first one where I haven't seen Sean at all, and I think that may be part of the problem.

I've just got to push through a few more months. Graduation is December 13th. That's not that far away. I can do this. I can.

Just another night on duty

Uggh...one thing I'm really looking forward to when I graduate is not having weekend duty anymore. I want to be able to go to bed when I'm ready, and not have to worry about getting a phone call in the middle of the night about random crap that's happening.

And yet, I love this job. I love the people that I work with. I love the people that I've met. I love the adrenaline rush I get when I have to handle a situation. I love knowing that I can handle it, and I love that I have back up I can call when I can't.

This has been a stressful week. I've been trying to stay on top of school work, I'm constantly thinking about the wedding and how much still needs to be done, and trying to balance out work and school and friends. I know that I'm just trying to do too much. And yet, I feel that if I had less to do, I would be totally bored.

Much of the problem is that it's just killing me to be so far away from Sean. I could get so much more accomplished if I could just stop daydreaming about him all the time. If we could meet for lunch, I wouldn't be as apt to just sit and mope about how much I miss him.

And it's oh so much. We were talking last night, and I was telling him how lucky I feel to have found forever on the first try. I can honestly say that he's my best friend. There are things that I've trusted him with that no one else will ever know. We've been through some rough times, but we always come out stronger. That sounds really cliched, but it's 100% true.

He has my heart. I'm so excited that in 5.5 months, I'll be Liz Snyder. I'm one lucky girl.




Oh, and here's what I learned to do this week. They aren't quite perfect, but I would say they're pretty close. I'm really lovin' Gimp.

Big news!

So, remember that totally cryptic entry from July? Well, I'm ready to reveal what it was about now.

Sean and I have decided to move the wedding up to February 28, 2009. That's five months, three weeks, and three days from right now. We went to bed on Saturday night with 321 days left, and woke up with 180 left. That was one nice sleep. :)

Now the fun stuff begins. We're trying to get everything figured out that we want, so that we can have this thing and finally be MARRIED! Oh man, I'm so super excited about it. When it was scheduled for July, we were both like "ehhh." Now though, we're ready!

As plans get more and more pulled together, I'll be sure to post things here. All in all though, I don't really care about all the little details! I'm marrying my best friend...that's the ONLY thing that really matters!


Oh, and here's a picture I did. I've been playing around with some photo editing, just in case you couldn't tell!

Back to the swing of things...

Classes have begun again. It's going to be a long semester; I can already feel it. It's not that I have super hard classes or anything, they're just all super intensive work-wise. Luckily, I like to do work.

Running is going superbly. I did just over 2 miles this morning without stopping at all. It's hard to believe that at the beginning of June, so less than 3 months ago, I was struggling to get a full mile. And it's so cool to see how much better I feel now that I get up and do something in the mornings. I mean, it's 8:30 and I've already ran and took a shower. Now I just have to make it through 3 classes, get new tires for my car (maybe today?), and go to BSU tonight.

It's going to be a good semester. IIt has to be; it's the last one!!