Just stuff

School is going.
Wedding plans are going.
The job hunt is going.

I'm just tired. So tired. This is by far the most intensive semester I've had in college. It just sucks that it had to be my last semester. Especially one in which I've got so much other stuff going on.

I also feel really bad, because I've hit a pretty serious wall about wanting to do stuff. I'm so sick and tired of listening to crap from people. I'm not kidding. I'm really afraid that one day I'm just going to snap. I'm going to all of a sudden start telling people what I think. And they aren't going to like it. At all. It won't be pretty.

For instance, I have a resident that keeps talking about how everyone seems so happy but he's miserable. I feel sorry for the kid. Really. But I can only take that for so long. Too much more of it and he's going to get an earful. Seriously, does he think everyone is happy all the time? Because I'm sure not. That's just ignorance. And I can only deal with ignorance for so long.

On top of that, I just find that I'm really unmotivated. I do my work, and I do it well, but I don't go above and beyond. I can't. I've given so much of myself to so many different things over the last three years that I'm out. I can't give extra right now.

I know that once I graduate, I'll be sad that I'm done. But right now, I just want to finish. I want to be in the same town as Sean. I want to be finalizing our wedding plans. I want to be working. Working somewhere where I can make a difference. I want to live in a house and not a box. I want to sleep in a big bed. I want a bath tub. I want a pet.

I want to grow up! (But not really)





Oh, and here's a picture I made the other day. Because of it, I changed the colors for the wedding. They're now black and white with pale green accents.